First Post

6 days to go till December 8th, 2014..

My Birthday..

Also the day I'm going to start working my first job. At 28 years old, I'm kinda old to feel the anxiety for the first day of my first job. But I do.



All my life I've been dependent on others. All my choices in life have been half-assed, just because there's a path provided before me. I have no desire to stray from the railroad built from my parent's money, my mediocre studies, pure dumb luck, and a working heart. Never once have I ever looked longingly at the path not taken. Mainly because there are only two other pathways in my mind, death, and unhinged madness, which also leads to death.

There were also other things going on in my mind other than death, of course. The sweet smell of death that greeted me almost every night have rather dissipated since I lost the desire to kill myself. Now Death is just an old friend, whom I almost forgot, but our memories still warms my heart.

1, 2, 3, 4, 5. Five mentions. I still miss him, I guess, deep down.

Enough of that, It's a new day! A new life!

Also, this new blogging thing I'm trying out. I can't spend my time stewing in silence anymore. I need to vent! Facebook ain't enough no more! I tried using other social medias. My mind felt cluttered with the increased interactions with other people. I felt tired and chained. I tried those Facebook games. Mafia Wars. Same thing. A waiting game for Notifications. Now I swore off social games. I only use Facebook as a public diary/reminder(blog?) anyway. I don't care who reads it. As long as I don't forget the password, I'm good. My old friends are all on Facebook. I can reconnect with them anytime I want. I don't even have to remember their names or phone number, just their faces. Couldn't find Death, though. Ha.

Now, if only I can keep doing this and not stop half-way like I did everything else...

I need to plan my time carefully. I heard this job has a killer schedule.

I AM a Doctor.

p/s: My favorite color is black.